NO Credit, Just CASH, By Humorist Will Roberts

Posted by on Dec 27, 2012

I kinda’ like to pride myself on the fact that I can say that
my writing style follows the great Humorist Will Rogers,
Will Roberts grammatical errors and all. I don’t claim to be a writer, just
a talker who knows how to type, with two fingers.
He used to say, “All I know is what I read in
the NEWSPAPER.”
And I say, “All I know is what I read on the INTERNET.”
You know, I’m keeping up with the times and technology.
However, right now it is getting to the point where I don’t
need the Internet, the newspaper or any other form of
media to get the plain truth.
Here is how I might be starting out my comments in
the near distant future … like now!
“All I know is what I read on American faces!” And
today I read hope, with a little sadness mixed in, with some
confusion in my fellow Americans. Now, more than ever,
our faces read like an open book. It could be because this is
the start of our holiday season. The only thing is that most
of us are so stressed out about everyday life, that adding
holly to this time (holi-day), only makes our stress look
more Christmasy.
Now this is the season of giving, although I bet most
Americans would rather it was renamed the season of
receiving. I don’t mean that to wreck the idea of Christmas,
just to change the focus a little and take the pressure off the
giving part.
Maybe, with the way things are, we might consider
renaming New Year’s Eve to New USED Year, because that
is all we can afford. And if Americans buy into this change
we will ask to pay for it all up front. No credit, just CASH.
Normally, the way that the Christmas season works is
we spend too much money on credit, and we eat too much.
These are some of the struggles in this decadent time of
year. Right now we just can’t pay for this season. On a good
note, this lack of everything in our country might get us
achieving our holiday season goals EARLY; spend less and
eat less. We will slim our wallets and tighten our belts, but
NOT by choice.
It is hard to eat when you hold your breath and that is
just what Americans are doing right now. At least until
one president moves in and the other moves out. Jan. 20,
2009 may not only be the day we get a breath of fresh air,
but a day we exhale after holding our breath for the past
eight years.
I am not sure this season will be to jolly if we don’t
take a different look at it. We have to cock our heads and
squint our eyes to see the joy during these times. It does
not help that we start the holidays with a day called “Black
Friday” or that the starting bell of that day was the ring of
an ambulance arriving at the scene of a Walmart on the east
coast, where an employee was killed by folks who trampled
him as the doors opened. Also, here in California, we had
a shooting at a Toys R` Us and two people died. If this is
the way things are going to be, we might just want to do
our shopping online and write on the packages “Don’t open
until Christmas 2012!”
Folks we need to find gifts in being a country this year
and look forward to this present we have been waiting to
open called … CHANGE. If our kids can believe in Santa
in a time where even he is considering getting his toys from
China, then we can surely have faith in change. That is the
best gift that we all could give each other, faith in our country
and its people. I know this sounds “corny” but it would
cost nothing and that is what we want to pay right now.
Times might get tougher and support is what we need. So,
this Christmas season, say “Hello,” or “Merry Christmas,”
or whatever you say for the holiday you celebrate. Keep the
spirit flowing as long as it is a cheerful one.
If you are reading this and saying “Humbug,” or some
other words that don’t fix this season, stay indoors because
we don’t want to hear it until after New Years Day.

Your friend,

Will Roberts

 

 

A Crackpot's Potshot at American Politics
A Crackpot’s Potshot at American Politics
by Will Roberts

Will Roberts has retained the wit and country mannerisms of Will Rogers, both on stage and in his writings. The daily articles on world events and politics are as typical of our times as Rogers’s daily sayings and Sunday articles of his day. I know you will enjoy the way Roberts has kept the legacy of a great journalist, skilled roper, actor, and an American icon in his writings today.

Doris Coke Lane Meyer, Grand-niece of Will Rogers

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